Fix Me Before I Bid Goodbye

T'was a fine bright day
When she t0ld me she has s0methng to say,
Then i asked what was it
She only said,"I'll tell you when we meet",
After a sec0nd, she put d0wn the ph0ne
Without telling me where will we c0nfabulate next m0rn.

Then the f0llowng m0rning came,
So excitd to listen of what she aims,
To speak next to me
And utter w0rds - whatevr will it be.

As i walkd thru d gallery,
I saw her with a c0mpany,
Who b0re an unfamiliar face
And was ab0ut to gve her a stunning ncklace.

I accidntally h0ld off my pen
And it br0ke the silence of the c0rrid0r then.

There she saw me standng near
And made her to appr0ach me in dear,
I greetd them a simple "hi",
Even th0ugh i'm startng to feel uneasy inside,
She resp0nd a blissful "hello"
And also the strange guy did so,
Them i grinned & made a smile
Just to sh0w i'm still fine in a while.

She startd intr0ducng me to him -
Giving me an obscure and sense of dim;
Then the wheel turnd into its opp0site r0und -
Where n0w she uttrs s0und
And w0rds to usher in
For me to kn0w him within.

"By the way, this Anth0ny, my b0yfriend"

After hearing th0s w0rdz frm hr
Seems my b0dy l0st its gravity -
Wher i can n0 l0nger bear
The whole of me 'cuz it's n t0rpidty,
And wher i can n0 l0nger c0ntr0l
The teardr0ps fr0m my eyes' s0ul.

I tried n0t to b to0 obvi0us
Though i was lyk sh0t by a blundrbuss
And was lyk stabbd by sw0rds
By her true heart-aching w0rds.

'Til n0w the w0und she causd hurts,
This heart of myn alm0st bursts,
For the platelets in my veins are bl0cking
That causes my cessati0n of breathng,
Wher the only remedy s to accpt the pain
And to c0ntr0l myself n0t to b insane,
But rathr only sh0ut and cry --
"Fix me bef0re i bid g0odbye".

-Jeff Paulo Saad

The Girl

In front of me was a cup filled with a hot soup. It seemed to torture my lips and my tongue every time I made a sip from it. On my right side was my book by Clare Clark and on my left was my as-if-telling-me-pay-me-heed cell phone. Outside the skies were crying, outstretching their pleas, uttering the thoughts they have as their grains drop on the leaves barely defying it due to less surface tension, and I, unfathomably dead serious, am falling. But just don't know to either which hand I shall be caught.

"Mid - September year twenty ten, you held me by your arms tight yet gentle, whispered me singsong strings of words beneath your breath, murmured something I hardly understood, remembered the auld lang syne sweet and mellifluous. I can feel the sentiments as the warm belch of breath from your mouth dumped against my neck and some area of my shoulder...

There was a moment pause in my preoccupied head. Around me was the nagging of life's facts, the overwhelming conscience, the need to create a master piece of my own, pressure of the wind pressing off my body temporarily making me busted and numbed. This place is dire enough to roam around. This place is full of insecurities, resentment and anguish. A moment still. There, on the corner, I saw a figure blurry but of a resemblance of an idiocy. My eyes curiosity brought my system to entire rapture of the thing I had seen. I couldn't figure out what's making it fuzzy, was it the thing itself or were those stubborn eyes. I peeped closely...

..suddenly, you were half - way out the door, your vivid attention intently searching something in me. Aye! You wanted me to say my last words for you. I had forgotten that you were just holding me that night to equipped myself with higher concentration on how to live life ALONE without thee, without you loving me anymore. I couldn't defy the urging eruption of abrupt intervention on such impeccable quiet night."

My body was already near the figure on the corner. She was sobbing. She kept on tapping her chest as if telling, "It has to be OK". On the left side was a beeping phone, the other side caught my interest... It was a book laid open and undone. As I stared closely, I literally drooped and got knocked off by a strong impression of reality. The girl went on from the I-pity-myself-but-I-have-to-cry situation which was intolerably devastating and alarmingly not kidding. I knew from that time that the crying lass was me, a fresh reflection of me for the passed almost two years that he came up, and gave me his willful GOODBYE.